being real today

Grandma Irene came this morning and helped with a bunch of stuff. That was really nice. She even took some of Mt. Washmore home to her house.

I’m at the point in a depression or something where I don’t want help. I want to live in my misery. I just want to sit and cry and do nothing; I don’t care.

I don’t like being here (in this state of mind).

I just want my husband home.

I want my house to clean itself. I want my basement warm so I want to do laundry and so it will dry.

I just want to curl up and cry.

Just existing today,