Confused. Tested. Unsure.

I have a friend who is hurting today. She is confused and physically bruised. Her dh got violent. She still loves him. But doesn’t want this. She has a lot of decisions to make in the next few hours and days. I am praying for her and for her dh and their many children. I am very sad for them.

Why am I so confused? Why do I feel tested and unsure? It’s a matter of balance and of legalism. I have a very strict point of view and belief on divorce. At least I think I do. I feel that although God allows for divorce in specific circumstances, I don’t believe that’s what He wants for His children. He wants families to stay together as a unit. Do I believe that God wants a woman to live with abuse? Of course not. Am I an expert on this subject? By no means. I don’t even have real life experience.

My friend and her dh were just getting on their feet again. Honestly, I feel like this is an attack on their marriage and their “getting ahead” and becoming the family they were meant to be. I know that I don’t know the whole story. I only get what she tells me. (And there are three sides to every story – his, hers, and the truth.) Satan does not want families that love God to stay together.

How do we define what God wants us to do? I would say that we go to the Bible. What does the Bible say on this topic? I think I will be looking into this a little more.

Some other questions that came up in my thinking of this topic, that I don’t really have answers for:

Is God’s love an ends justifies the means? Is God’s love for us separate from His laws and the principles we are to live by??? Or is His love wrapped up in those principles and laws? Just like we as parents have for our children, God has rules and guidelines for us too. Because He loves us.

I am so thankful for the man I have been given. I have been incredibly blessed by one who has never raised a hand (or foot) in anger. He is a man that has a very high level of control in most areas of life. He’s not given to addictions or such things. I can trust that a decision made has been thought through and is not just a willy-nilly response.

More thoughts on divorce and such things (from one who’s never been there):

Divorce is always wrong. We are to submit to our dh’s. That doesn’t mean one has to accept the beatings. Rather we need to get the proper authorities involved and get him (and herself) help. Keep ourselves and our children save. This has been my belief, developed over time. Do I really believe that? Is that what I would do? In today’s world, would there be ANYONE that would support me in that? Or would I be totally on my own? And if so, would I be strong enough? Who is my strength? Who is my friend’s strength?

What does the Bible say? What’s the real deal? Not watered down? Not hyper-religious? Not legalistic? I’m tired of the chaff! I want the meat. Anyone have any answers???? Is it situational? Is God a situational God???

Striving to learn and live God’s purposes,